THE HEAD OF THE HOUSEHOLD?!!

Yep, mea culpa, not being remotely perfect is pretty good to be honest.

I tend to walk in front of everyone when I am outside. I don’t know why but I have always done it. Today I was wandering round Ardmore with Wendy and Dash the dog and we were wittering, or at least Wendy was and I was occasionally replying although she couldn’t always hear because she was usually about two paces behind me and to the left of me, while my replies were sent to some imaginary person besides me.

In the end Wendy got fed up and started quizzing me about other people I walk with and I had to confess I always walk ahead of people and that on the photography walks I tend to disappear away from everyone within minutes of setting off, to the extent that it is fairly common for me to reach the end of the walk without a clue where the rest of the group is.

Having found out that I do this with everyone Wendy took direct action and said my actions signified the status in which I held her and that now that she was not working, she knew her status was much reduced and accordingly, she had to abide by all my wishes and always walk two paces behind me and not speak to me unless I spoke to her.

It was immensely irritating! In the end I said if she had to abide by my wishes she had to walk besides me but still she refused! She wasn’t able to stop talking though and kept up a commentary on everything under the sun but mainly about this habit of mine.

At one point I grabbed hold of her hand so she could walk beside me but in the manner of a child, she lagged behind, to be almost dragged; just to make her point.

Eventually we got side-tracked by the smell of the roses that have all come into flower and for brief moments we walked side by side when Wendy stopped teasing me and said she really didn’t enjoy talking to my shoulder when we were walking and that the side by sideness was pleasurable and please could I remember it in the future?

I’ll try to. I live inside my own world a lot and often do not realise how things like this affect those I love. It’s a bit embarrassing trying to say I support feminism when I tend to act like a Victorian gentleman, leaving my partner and children to walk demurely behind me.

Luckily neither Wendy nor the children have any trouble in pointing out my various absurdities and have never managed to be demure in their lives!!

First published in the Bothy Blether of Jeans Bothy. To learn more of my life and my families life have a look at my memoirs START and Blackbird Singing. Easiest in Amazon but message me for a different route.